Don’t hate the rich… be one of them!

We spoke to multi-millionaire Michael Green about his successful career in internet marketing.

My name is Michael Green and I’m a multi-millionaire (alongside being the former alter-ego of Grant Shapps MP chairman of the Conservative Party…but I’d ask you to ignore that here)! The first question I get asked when people hear about my extensive wealth is ‘Michael, Michael, how did you make your millions?’ The quick and simple answer is easy; Internet marketing of course!

Now I’m back in the public eye with a new multimedia lecture revealing the secrets to Internet marketing success and a better life for you and your family! Making money online is easy, and you should know that if you’re working hard you know you’re doing capitalism wrong – you can learn this by looking at the lives of cleaners and CEOs! But knowing the steps to developing an online company as successful as mine, HowToCorp, is not so easy…that’s where I step in!

I’ll start by teaching you how to develop a marketable online identity! Business is all about selling your self. Here I take what you might have learned from about identity presentation from Facebook and show you how to develop a new online identity for profit! Of course I have a lot of experience using other identities…

It’s not just me though! I’ll walk you through a history of using false identities for profit, from avant-garde art practices to 419 scams. And remember, if it’s good enough for the Metropolitan Police then surely its good enough for your company?

Working online means one always has to be wary of NSA and GCHQ monitoring. Do they know too much about your alternative identity practice? I’ll walk you through how to avoid internet surveillance, a must for any Internet marketer worth their salt…you’ve got nothing to hide anyway though, right?

Finally the other question I get is ‘Michael, these tactics might work for you, but I don’t have any original ideas…how can someone like me make money online?’ Well my friend, this is late-capitalism! Innovation isn’t rewarded – copying is the future! Taking cues from my text-lifting software TrafficPaymaster (only $200!), as well as Guy Debord and Hollywood superhero films, I’ll show you how to copy someone else’s idea to make your very own millions!

This performance really will change your life! Ask Simon Farid, he’s never looked back!

I’ve been Michael Green.